he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
So gin and wine won't be happening again
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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