Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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