Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
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