your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
