Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Randomize
