Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
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Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
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I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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