And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Randomize