I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Randomize
