watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize
