The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Randomize
