SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
