gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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