Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
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