Well douche your snatch and let's go!
This is not my ceiling
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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