oh god the rape fog is back!
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize