my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
