YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
