3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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