Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
