She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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