Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
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i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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