Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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