I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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