Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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