weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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