he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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