Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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