You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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