ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize