he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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