I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
How external is "for external use only"?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
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