dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Randomize
