i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Randomize
