I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
