Ambien. No doubt about it.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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