Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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