My room smells like vodka and shame
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize