On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Randomize