how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Randomize
