i think my tv is drunk
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
