okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
