Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize