Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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