drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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