Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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