the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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