note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
