We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize