It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
