what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
I can't turn off my feet"
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
